Day 84: The Monotony

It's sad how often we slip into cycles. Wake up, eat, work, read (maybe), sleep, repeat. In between these glorious staples, we sometimes interject random moments of greatness (catching up with friends, spending time with family, going on a date), but mostly we stick to our schedules.
 
We are humans, and even if you are a very spontaneous person, routine is ingrained into the fabric of American culture. And it seems that we do this routine out of comfort, not because we necessarily want to.

In a way, we need to.

That's what, when I read about Jesus, everything is so gosh darn radical. Preaching, teaching, casting out demons...there is so much that Jesus accomplishes. And, although His message never changed, and remained unwavering, He was not one to fall into the monotony of things.

He never woke up and delighted in a schedule.
He woke up and delighted in what He was going to do to further the Kingdom of God.
How often does this happen to us? 
 
I personally know that when I wake up, I'm thinking if I'll have enough time to scarf something down before heading to work. I am not thinking about what God has for me throughout the day, or necessarily for how I can further the Kingdom.

In my reading today, the prophets attempt to entrap Jesus as they ask Him if it's lawful to heal on the Sabbath. Jesus cooly responds by saying that it is right to do good on the Sabbath, upholding the spirit of what God wants from us over the face value of God's word.

I saw this as a direct relation to my lack of looking forward to what God will do through me each day. I stick to what I know (my schedule, and all that I have to finish), much like the Pharisees stayed tied to their general conception of what the Sabbath was, and meant. Both of us missed the mark, putting too much emphasis on what we thought needed to be done, or what we thought something was really about, instead of seeing what is right in front of us.

The Pharisees failed to see that doing good on Sabbath is not dishonoring God.
I fail to see that God can work through my hectic schedule and can lift me out of my silly routine.

I want more than my routines, and low expectations.
I want more from my life.



Help me, Jesus.






In Christ,






Lilia

Day 83: Wisdom is Proved Right By Action

If there is one thing that John Mark has said at church that has stuck with me, it is how very important it is to live in the gospels, so to speak. Yes, the entire bible is important, and entirely relevant to our lives and purpose, but knowing Jesus is at the center of everything else. This new year, I switched from my old reading plan so that I could effectively read through the entire bible front to back, simply (shout out to Chris for the advice there). It has already made a difference because I get to spend some time each day rediscovering the savior of the world.
 
In chapter 11 of Matthew, that I read today, there was a small part that stood out to me unlike any other time I've read through this gospel. Jesus is discussing how he and John the Baptist have been described through preconceived, and negative, notions, John as a “demon” and Jesus himself as a glutton and drunkard:

“For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and “sinners.”’ But wisdom is proved right by her actions.” Matthew 11:18-19

Here, Jesus is illustrating how He and John are both despised for nothing. In this situation, and with this line of thinking, it seemed to be that they were in trouble one way or another. But, it's what Jesus says at the end that really stuck with me: but wisdom is proved right by her actions.

It got me thinking: what am I doing?

In my job, in my life, in my faith...are any of my actions wise?

Am I even trying to establish myself in wisdom through my actions?

Essentially, Jesus is proving a point saying that although people will mock and sometimes slander, your actions will ultimately show what wisdom you have, if any.

I am so worried, so often, that what I am doing is not glorifying at all. And sometimes I wonder, does my existence really make a difference? Am I anything to behold?

Why would the God who created everything ever be satisfied with me?

And then I read through the gospels, and I see Jesus processing things the way that I do, except He has the answers I need, and so desperately desire.

I've realized that in order to gain wisdom from God, I need to be conscious in my actions and what I spend my life doing. Am I helping others? Is the desire even present? Am I loving without thought for myself? Am I loving as He loves me?

Or am I just wasting away on facebook and fast food? 

Am I more worried about what I'm going to wear than the fact that so many people around the world have nothing to wear?

Examine your life, as I do mine; find out if what you are doing is proving you wise, or is showing you to be a fool.

At my age, the thought of being wise is so ridiculous that I can't even begin to fathom it. But, I realize that now is the time to start storing up wisdom because there will come a time when God will graciously put people in your life who may need it. And one of those people may be yourself.

Be kind to yourself as you follow Jesus, but also push to find out what you are doing that is wise so that you can think on those things, and continue doing them to the glory of God.

In Christ,

Lilia

Day 82: For You

This blog is going to be simple, and really one of encouragement.

This is for you.


I know you're having a hard time, and that God may feel far away. You may find yourself doubting whether His good is also for you, or whether it's regulated to those more deserving, and more worthy.

You are worthy, and He does speak, even if it is in the silence.

Set your sight on His word; relish it, devour it. Look at creation to remind yourself that He is a great God, and that He is able to do anything for, and through, you.

Do not be discouraged by this world, the lies of the enemy, and any other adversity that comes your way. We are to bear each other's burdens, to come alongside each other and uplift the downcast parts of our souls. Remember that through trials come growth, and that faith is developed and tested through times of difficulty.

Be encouraged, and take hope, all you who hope in the Lord.

And, in the midst of confusion or hardship, live by faith, trusting not only that God will bring you through this, but also that He will refine you in whatever fire you find yourself in.

While you wait, in expectation for His voice to greet you in your prayer, or time alone with Him, remember what He requires of you, and live it out: seek justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.

You will come out of this because He has called you to good according to His purpose, and because our pain pales in comparison to His glory.

Be encouraged, and be blessed. Live blameless as you wait upon the Lord, and wait well.


In Christ,


Lilia

Day 81: Draw Me Away

I'm going to use my blog to shamelessly plug this sermon. It is seriously one of my favorites, and I think it really has the potential to speak into so many people's lives, especially those still looking, or discerning, their place as a man or woman in the realm of relationships and in God's eyes.

This sermon is given by John Mark Comer, and it is from a series on Song of Solomon that he taught in 2007 at The Way.

This message centers around the fact that God is a romantic, and rejoices when men and women fall in love in His time.

Listen, be encouraged, and laugh! In addition to being one of the most solid messages I've listened to, it's also one of the funniest.

I was there when this was recorded, and can remember where I was at that time. It's amazing to see how faithful God has been. I think that my desire to hear this again is more of God reminding me that he has shown and taught me that everything comes in His time, but that there is much to hope for.

Happy listening!


“Draw Me Away (Help Her Get Off the Camel!)”
http://www.ajesuschurch.org/teachings/all-teachings/02-23-2007.mp3


In Christ,



Lilia

Day 80: That it May Go Well

This day started out terribly. Without going into much detail, I dropped the ball and missed out on one of my most important responsibilities. I instantly went into “depressed” mode. I didn't want to leave my room, or really go to church. I felt so bad that I just wanted to wallow in it.

So very pathetic.

Eventually, I remembered that we all make mistakes, and that I need to do everything I can not to make the mistake again, but I also needed to get on with my day.

Around noon, I finally stumbled out of my bedroom in some wrinkled jeans and oversized sweatshirt (attractive, I know), and went to lunch with a friend. What an amazing blessing it was to have fellowship on a day that started out so bleak. It was nice to catch up, and to talk about how God sometimes blesses us with what He removes from our lives. We also talked about Haiti, which always makes me happy.

After lunch, I went home and vegged for a little bit. I knew that I wanted to work out, but I wasn't sure how to go about it. I could feel the sun streaming in, and I knew that it was a day to run outside. After finding my iPod, I had the urge to listen to a sermon from so long ago...2007 to be exact. I found it on the solid rock website (praise Jesus!) and ran while listening to it.

It was an incredible blessing...but more on that later :)

After my run, I felt so much better about my day. I came home, chatted with the roomies for a bit, and then got ready for church.

I'm not going to spend a long time dissecting the message, mostly because Phil was so straightforward in his outlining of what we need to do. Mainly, the discussion was focused on becoming a more fervent disciple of Jesus.

More than any New Year's resolution, we should all want to know Jesus far more intimately than we do now.

In his message, Phil centered around Deuteronomy 4: 39-40:

39 Acknowledge and take to heart this day that the LORD is God in heaven above and on the earth below. There is no other. 40 Keep his decrees and commands, which I am giving you today, so that it may go well with you and your children after you and that you may live long in the land the LORD your God gives you for all time.

Mainly, he called our attention to the fact that the LORD, Yahweh, is in heaven above and with us on earth, and that there is no other. This God that we serve is a creator, one of a kind, and by keeping his commands, we may go well in our lives, living long in the land that He has given us.

Based on these verses, Phil plotted out five ways to live so that it may go well in our lives...

1. A disciple of Jesus obeys God's commands.
   It seems so simple, but so often we all play the pick and choose game. Oh yes, Jesus, I love what you say here about this, but I don't really like that, so I'll just avoid what you say about it. We can't be lukewarm in our feelings towards God's commands, picking what we will and will not follow. It is our choice, but He wants us to chose. It's also important to remember that God's commands are for our good and His glory, and that a disciple obeys God's commands instantly, even when it hurts.
   
   The part I loved most about Phil's discussion on this point was when he asked the question: Are you living above the scriptures (picking and choosing what you want to do so you can be “happy”) or are you living under the scriptures and their authority?
   
   We have all chosen to ignore certain things that God commands of us because, certainly, He wants us to be happy...so how could He expect me to really do this, or that? Wake up, disciple! Following God's commands doesn't entail happiness, they entail joy, and that sometimes comes through difficult times. Don't fool yourself into believing that you can pick and choose what you follow and still be a disciple of Christ.
   
   
2. A disciple of Jesus meditates on God's words.
   This point is so incredibly important, and so incredibly difficult. You have to make time for the Word of God because there will never be any time if you don't. Meditating, and chewing, on what God has to say about how are to live our lives is essential to being a disciple of Christ. How will we know who He is and what He requires of us if we don't read and meditate on His word?
   
   If you are not reading the Word consistently, and putting what it says into practice, think of this truth about the bible: This book will keep you from sin, and sin will keep you from this book. Be real with yourself about what you need to do, and how you need to adjust your life to center it around the Word of God.
   
   
3. A disciple of Jesus lives to serve others. 
   Oh, my goodness! I loved what Phil talked about during this point when he distinguished that living to please others and living to serve others is not the same thing. That hit home for me, because so many times I am a people pleaser. However, when we aim to please people, we are really wanting to make sure that we are doing a great job, or that we are good enough, which totally means that we are focusing on ourselves!
   
   When we serve others, we aren't thinking of ourselves at all, which is the point. To serve means adjusting our schedule and routines to meet the needs of someone else. Jesus came not to be served, but to serve, and when we see the world through that lens, it makes serving that much more desirable.
   
   
4. A disciple of Jesus abides in Jesus.
   John 15, baby! He is the true vine, and we are the branches. The plain truth is that without Him, we will perish. Look not only for the vine, but for the fruit that you should produce when rooted in Him. Galatians 5 outlines the fruit of the spirit, as well as the fruit of the flesh. Which fruits characterize your life? Hopefully the answer is love, joy, patience, kindness, gentleness, etc, and if it isn't, then abide in Jesus to find those fruits. You can tell a disciple by their fruit...so get some :)
   
   
5. A disciple of Jesus places Jesus first, above all else.
   He calls us to deny ourselves, take up our crosses, and follow Him. It can be summed up like this: If He's not Lord of all, He's not Lord at all.

Whew! I know that was a lot, but it was an awesome message. As Phil said, none of this is profound, or new, or something we haven't heard before.

The profound thing is living it.


In Christ,


Lilia

Day 79: On the Death of Pretty

Recently, I read an article called “The Death of Pretty.” You can find it here: http://www.ncregister.com/blog/the-death-of-pretty 
 
At first, I found myself immediately enjoying the article, and really identifying with it. The gist of the entire article was basically a lament by the author about how women handle themselves in society, and how men react to these portrayals. He focuses mainly on the idea that “pretty” is dying, and he defines pretty as “a mutually enriching balanced combination of beauty and projected innocence.”

I tracked with this definition, and argument, that in our society, so many women are focused on everything but projecting an innocence in their public appearance. He notes that women today do not desire, or aspire, to be pretty. Instead, they want to be regarded as “hot.” 
 
He notes that there are specific differences in what “pretty” and “hot” mean, and the way that men respond to these two versions of how a woman may portray herself: “As I said, pretty inspires men’s nobler instincts to protect and defend.  Pretty is cherished. Hotness, on the other hand, is a commodity.  Its value is temporary and must be used.  It is a consumable.”

I completely agreed with everything in this article, mostly because I, as a woman, have often sought to be regarded as hot instead of pretty. I have wanted the attention of men for less than noble reasons, and have dressed in a way to achieve that. Obviously, when I came to Christ, that all changed...but I'd be a liar to say that it's been completely eradicated.

Sadly, there are still times when I feel like pretty isn't enough.

With all that to say, it was refreshing to me to hear all of this...to know that there are men who desire a woman who is pretty, and who doesn't strive to be something she is not to gain attention because, as the author of the article noted, hotness is merely a commodity. It is there to be consumed, and then left. Pretty, and beautiful, are what remain. They go deeper than what a woman looks like.

They embody who she is. And beauty and prettiness especially shine in the light of a woman's foundation in Christ.

However, there was one thing I took issue with in this article, and it was the author's determination that a projected innocence was a part of what it means to be pretty.

First of all, when I think of a projected innocence, I immediately think of a facade. We are not innocent, and we haven't been since the garden. Losing my virginity at the age of 17, I now know that I can never get that back. I can never have that innocence again. 
 
Does that mean that I can't be pretty? 
 
Am I completely lost because I refuse to project an innocence that I no longer have?

Now, not every woman has lost her innocence in that way, but it is impossible to live in light of an innocence that was done away with so long ago in the Fall. And so, I think that defining pretty with a projected innocence that, in essence, isn't even real, does not contribute to a woman's beauty, or prettiness.

In my opinion, I think that the idea of purity should instead replace the concept of innocence. I would define pretty as “a mutually enriching balanced combination of beauty and purity.” I know that I can't regain innocence that I have lost, but I know that I can strive for purity. 
 
God constantly urges us to remain pure, in both body and mind. We are not called to lead an easy life, but we are called to live a pure life.

And, to me, there is nothing more attractive than a woman, or a man, fighting for their purity. It is one of the most beautiful and amazing sights to behold.

So, read this article. Enjoy it, be enlightened by it, and really internalize what the author is getting at.

Being “hot” is a commodity. It doesn't last, and it sure doesn't incite anything from men other than an invitation to act in a way that is not honorable to himself, the woman, or God.

Instead, be pretty, but don't feel like you need to project an innocence that is so far from humanity. Embrace the fact that your story may not be one of innocence, and instead may be one of redemption, like mine.

Again, it is merely my opinion that purity should take the place of this “projected innocence,” but either way, the focus is that women should desire to be beautiful and pretty because it lasts. And, more than the fact that “pretty” is cherished, and encourages men to protect and defend it, it is what we are called to be in Christ. 
 
We are made in the image of a beautiful creator, not one who is a consumable or a commodity, but one who is the beginning and end.

Women, portray yourselves in light of God's beauty, knowing that a man after God's heart will see beauty not only in what you look like, but in your deeds, your spirit, and your adoration for the one true God.



In Christ,
Lilia

Day 78: His Name Is Hope

“I did everything right, so why is it all going wrong?”
I selfishly asked myself that a few days ago. Looking at where I am in life, I couldn't be more dissatisfied. I work a barely-above-minimum-wage job doing something I borderline detest just to make ends meat. I have lived my life by the book, so to speak. I went to school; I earned good grades; I have a bachelor's AND master's degree for goodness sake.
And then I realized...that's a whole lot of I's.
In my life, I've guarded everything I've accomplished in my own hands. My independence always seems to get the best of me, especially when I know that I have better things, in a sense, to do. I want to force pieces of the puzzle into place when I don't even know that the bigger picture is; and that's what my life is now.
I've come to a crossroads, of sorts, between remaining full time at the position I have now, or choosing to go back to a part time position in order to mostly retain my sanity, and hopefully find another part time job that will help me to live more than from paycheck to paycheck. But, the thing is, when I came to this decision, I took over.
I thought about it; I called my mom to talk it over. And, of course, who was the last to hear about it? God.
On the way home, I found myself distraught that I had done this...how could I keep this from Him, how could I let myself pretty much come to a conclusion without even consulting the God who gave me this job as a blessing when I had nothing?
So, on the way home, I prayed...crying, and speaking in a really soft voice, whispering as if I was sitting with God as a small child, and telling him my deepest and darkest secrets. I asked Him to speak to me, to tell me what he thought. I said I was sorry for bringing everything to Him so late in my thought process. I prayed to hear Him.
I heard nothing.
And I feel like I've still heard nothing.
So, I asked for the advice of friends that are centered in Him, and will continue praying, remembering that He hears me and has only good for me.
I've been remembering how many names He has: prince of peace, servant king, the great I AM. But for me, right now, His name is hope.
I know I can hope in Him, amidst my silly struggles and the reality that I'm still learning how to ask for His direction in my life.
His name IS hope.



In Christ,






Lilia