Day 7: He is Faithful to Me

At this time last year, my life was in ruins. I had just ended a relationship of almost two years and found myself living with my ex boyfriend because neither of us could realistically leave our living situation without severely hurting ourselves financially.

I've never been so in touch with my sin. Every day was a reminder of the choice I made when I placed myself in that relationship, and put myself in that living situation. I felt the pain that I brought upon myself, and that I brought upon my boyfriend at the time. I saw how our breakup nearly destroyed him, and that image is burned in my memory.

It was a dark time. I knew I had walked away from the Lord, deliberately, and now I wondered if there was going back. How could I? How could He? Forgiveness seemed so out of the question.

Oh me of so little faith.

This morning, I read through my daily chronological reading plan that I am doing, and I read one line in a psalm that spoke volumes to me. Until now, I wasn't sure what to blog about, but when I prayed and then clicked on the reading again (to refresh my memory) that same line of the psalm was on my screen, highlighted. So, here it is:

“Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the LORD has been good to you.” Psalm 116:7

This verse resonates in so many ways, but for me it really speaks of God's faithfulness and His goodness. A year ago, I was lost, confused, and incredibly unhappy. I was always uneasy in my decisions and was doubtful of what my future held.

And now, a year later, I am renewed in my faith, centered on Christ and actively working to serve the community He has given me. In one year, I have been encouraged and restored by the creator of the universe. He has allowed me to go from a part time position to a full time position at my job (which is amazing, because I am the only full time sales associate and they created that position for me), and He's allowed me to transition from assistant coach to head coach for the girl's lacrosse team that I work with.

It's not what I imagined for myself, or even what I wanted necessarily, but it's worth it because it's from the Lord. I'm not consumed with worrying about my future (don't get me wrong, I still get anxious sometimes about what He has for me) because ultimately I know that if I'm walking with Him, I am where I need to be.

The funny thing is, that when I think about the pain that I was in a year ago, it seems like it was ages ago. But that's how God is. When you come back to Him, the changes are so evident that you fall right back into His grace and it feels like you never left. He is the type of father who holds nothing against you, but welcomes you back, with love, into His pasture.

My God is faithful, and gives me rest for my soul.

In all of this, He's not only teaching me that He is good, but He's taking the time to show me how He is good. And I love Him for that.

In Christ,

Lilia